on one of the rare days you get a few hours to yourself

you decide to take a bus out

recall taking big steps out of the sports complex

how your body reacts to large groups of people by tensing up

always ready for flight

but i am never really free

out the bus window a tree is crying LED tears

can’t trust yourself to call home without being in the privacy of your room

steady your voice, only say ‘mm’

watch a video of a Thai girl picking a baby up and raising her as her own

tear without knowing why

behind you a Taiwanese Accent says to a Chinese Accent

“我想证明 其实我也行”

think of how you’ve learnt to hold your tongue

violently refuse to speak

too misunderstood, too mistaken

too assuming, too simplistic

people think what they will

i’ve already given you a smile as an answer

sometimes my cheeks are faulty, try again later

how easy it is to fall in love with beauty

what will it take to comprehend darkness

days on end i think about this

don’t know when, if ever, i can get out

all the words no-one can comprehend

i’ll write them all
for you